I have often wondered about birthdays and how it became to such a ritual of cake, candles, gifts, and expectation. Though a joyous, fun community celebration, over time it has become an occasion for greed, much like Christmas and Diwali.
Please don’t get me wrong as I do love the celebration myself. I am curious about how different cultures celebrate birthdays, some even by not paying any attention to it.
The day the prompt ‘talisman’ came about, I thought of doing a post on it but didn’t want to see it as an object. Therefore, it took me a little while, but here is the thought I am going with. “A talisman is an object created to hold or embody a belief.”
To be specific, a birthday gift can be an object, a hand-made card, or even a sing-song of a poetic ritual on someone’s special day!
I have mailed a lot of imperfect home-made cards and queer poems to family and friends while growing up. Then it became cool to buy cards or make commercial wishes to come true, so the hobby fell to the wayside. I have recently tried to revive it, especially for my children, but I am positive it gives rise to mixed feelings 😀
To conclude, I am going to risk writing an ode to all cousins of mine, who turned fifty at some point in their lives. Especially you know, the kind of cousin who can deal with anything you dish out, or the type whose jokes or frivolities you can deal with at par. I hope my sincerity is appreciably misunderstood, Cuzz;)
An Ode to Lord Cuzzon Ole’
On Your Fiftieth!
WAIT A Minnnnnute! You’re how Old?
I don’t believe it! Don’t greet with a font so BOLD!
Dismiss this bloody Hallmark SCAM!
The 50th Birthday is just a SHAM!
My memory failz me, my speech is a slurr,
You looked like Hell, as you shoftly did purr.
Wish the Tooth Fairy shwitches out with a Gout Fairy,
Wishing you well, as you turn a shameless white hairy.
I’d like to buy you a drink wid a wink,
though it’s hard to see you shrink ‘n’ stink;
Shadness overcomes me as you bend over ‘n’ roll
to velcro your shoos amidst an involuntary schnooze.
New-Shkills-Envy! I shee you multi-tahsk with ease,
At once together, you’re able to laugh, cough, pee, ‘n’ sneeze!
Poopy and droopy, you schtupid child!
Shtill the same, aren’t you, wid a touch of d’ WILD!
Do chew or screw, confuzeling family few!
Rationalize. Celebrate. You’ve shtill got it!
Though you haven’t grown the slightest bit.
Except aches ‘n’ pains have ya moan ‘n’ grown!
“The choice is clear,” say near and dear,
“You now never have to!” they add with fear.
You bellow, “Shay Happy Fiffiethh ONE more time!”
“I won’t bikeeth you a shingle penny O’mine!”
He aims his gun at me! HELP!